Homewrecker Spoon

by Life in a Blender

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04:30
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03:20
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03:27
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03:27
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03:15
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credits

released October 31, 2011

Al Houghton: guitars, banjo, organ, piano, backing vocals, percussion
Ken Meyer: drums, cymbals, percussion
Don Ralph: vocals
Mark Lerner: bass, mandolin, banjo, backing vocals
Rebecca Weiner Tompkins: violin, viola
Dave Moody: cello, live tambourine

With the Colony Collapse Horns:

Jackie Coleman: trumpet
Kevin Moehringer: trombone
Gavin Smith: alto sax

Additional musicians:

Ed Pastorini: piano on "Summer Goes Too Fast," "Kill the Bottle," "Sean Connery," and "Homewrecker Spoon"
Jane Young: backing vocals on "Summer Goes Too Fast," "Sean Connery," and "Homewrecker Spoon"

Produced by Al Houghton
Recorded and mixed at Dubway Studios
Engineered by Mike Judeh, Stephen Schappler, and Al Houghton
Assistant engineers: Anthony Gibney, John Thayer, Chris Montgomery
Mastered by Scott Hull at Masterdisk
Strings and horns arranged by Mark Lerner
Additional string arrangements by Al Houghton
Illustrations by Leo Rauf
Graphic design by Mark Lerner at Rag and Bone Shop
Special thanks to Beth Mackin
All songs © 2011 Don Ralph (Stingy Brim Music/ASCAP)

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about

Life in a Blender New York, New York

For over 25 years, Life in a Blender has been the canvas for singer and songwriter Don Ralph's blackly comic landscapes. The group has released 8 albums ranging from screaming punk to orchestrated chamber pop, and has brought the high theatrics of its live act to stages from Berlin to Austin to Toronto to Brooklyn and Seattle. ... more

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Track Name: Go To Man
People come to me cuz I'm the go to man
I've got a couple thousand dollars in my coffee can
I've got a pair of extra tickets in my pickup truck
Tell me what you need and I will set you up
I'll set you up
I'll set you up
You're the customer you deserve something nice
I'll set you up
I'll set you up
Don't give up, call it quits, just speak up, name your price
You may have a taste for designer jeans
Or a little something sweet from the Philippines
I even have a sister in the CIA
If you need to disappear, I can find a way to set you up
I'll be there to soothe your brow
To hold your hand at least for now
But there may come a special time when I may ask you to
[Do me a favor]
You're looking kind of nervous join me on the stoop
Why don't you try a bowl of my chunky soup
There's no need to worry that you're in too deep
Just take this pill, it will help you sleep
People come to me cuz I'm the go to man
I've got a couple thousand dollars in my coffee can
I've got a pair or extra tickets in my pickup truck
Tell me what you need and I will set you up
When I was young I slipped through the fence
I went all the places no one else went
I even slipped through at my birth
No wonder Shel calls me a piece of work
But you need me, oh you need me, only I can show you how to shine
A big mystery it's not, from the Ferris wheel you all look like dots
I made some choices, no piece of cake
I pushed my luck but I pulled my weight
But you need me, oh you need me, only I can show you how to shine
Oh you need me, oh you need me, I can show you just how to get by
Track Name: Homewrecker Spoon
Barbed wire and the raccoon bone
Full lip covered with soda foam
Let them walk ahead
Take a sip my friend
The moon's so full looks like it ate the sun
So bright you'd never know the night's begun
You cannot hide your tracks
Up on Cherry Flats
Reminds me of Old Homewrecker Spoon
The nursery rhyme should have given you a clue
Oh, Annie likes to jump right in
Through the water see her blue white skin
Might as well toss rocks at the battered log
Some things you just can't explain
Some moths like the dimmest flame
It may keep you warm, but it will still go dark
Little dog laughed to see such folks
I said, "Oh yeah, sport. It's just a bad joke."
You gotta get out soon, before your fingers prune
Up on his shoulders, she looks so cold
I'm never going up there when I'm that old
I'm gonna stay down low with the animals
And she takes me along
Down that rotten road
With promises of fun
But I'd rather just be home
And I don't have a map
But a flashlight might do
If I can make it to the car
I know I'd make it through
And it feels so good to run
Feel the buttons on my shirt
But my sneakers really suck
And my feet really hurt
Reminds me of Old Homewrecker Spoon
Track Name: The Answer
I am the answer
Waiting for you in the cupboard
I am dancer
Performing for you there is no other
Light in your brain
Please let me explain
I may come in
A clear plastic bag
Dripping down
Like the slowest rain
I am the answer
Moving all your heavy luggage
I am dancer
Even though your words grow sluggish
Days, all the days
They pile up
But each one fits the maze
Random turns and dead ends
Where are all my friends
I am the answer
Burning through every room in your brain
It's okay. Even the ceiling says you're okay.
And this collage I have brought you would have stayed permanently dark
But then you let me inside, you let me inside, and now my world is going up
It's going up in flames
Track Name: Sean Connery
You should see
Sean Connery
In a photo I've got in the drawer
He holds his hands like he's been caught
Not so tough any more
And he's reading a magazine
With Sammy Davis Junior on the cover
And he's breathing a little rapidly
Because someone you can't see has got the gun on him
They've got the gun on him, they've got the gun on him
But it's just a flash
Because even in the bath
He's still strong, he's still strong
But it makes me laugh because there's Sean Connery
And he's frightened just like a little boy
Track Name: Hoot Owl
Oh you can see my house from here it's just around the curve
You can park round in back in the spot "Reserved"
The neighbors are all dreaming I'm the only one that's lit
Let me find my house key bear with me a little bit
Hoot Owl
Garbage in, garbage out all around the clock
I can hear you talk about me half way round the block
Talk about me all you want I just don't give a fuck
Are you surprised
Leave your shoes at the front door
I just got some new groceries
Throw your coat on the kid's bed
Beer is what I got mostly
I like the way you hang, hang on my every [word]
Stay away from the window
Here let's toast to our future
Hell the night is still early
Let's see how long we can stretch it out
Track Name: The Juiciest Plum
Into the garbage you have seen the feathers of a dove
The weatherman keeps telling you there's trouble up above
Crumpled magazines in frustration have been tossed
Well let me prop your chin up chum believe me all's not lost
We'll squeeze the juiciest plum
We'll breathe, at least breathe in some
And if the world should turn to black
We'll just turn and double back
And if the world should turn to glass
We won't even leave a smudge
Sometimes the world seems extra fat and bursting at the seams
Sometimes when you're about to sleep you swear your pillow screams
Your fingers look dishonest, especially the thumb
Well, I've got two good hands here, sir. And I can lend you one.
We'll squeeze the juiciest plum
We'll breathe, at least breathe in some
And if the world should turn to black
We'll just turn and double back
And if the world should turn to grey
At least it's not so black we'll say
Tunnels inside tunnels keep the light from seeping in
You may need to touch someone even with creepy skin
Oh, Hi! Just wipe your feet outside and please come right on in
My story will not bore you, sir. Oh, where do I begin?
We'll squeeze the juiciest plum
We'll breathe, at least breathe in some
And if the world should turn to dust
We'll let it blow right over us
And if the world should turn to fog
With outstretched arms we'll walk on
Track Name: The Rain Makes Me Thirsty
Late at night when the kids are low
No one hears my slippered toe
My slippered toe, my slippered toe
It's up to the roof, oh they do not know
Leaves show their pale white underside
Tar paper flaps like it's keeping time
And the first raindrop, and the second raindrop
Down they come and they will not stop
The rain just makes me thirsty
The rain just makes me want it bad
The rain just makes me thirsty
And there's a dog out there
Howling worse than me
And his chain's pulled taut
And he can't break free
Am I not a special catch?
In my wet bathrobe without its sash
Without its sash, without its sash
Come on over and we'll have a laugh
I fool myself that I'll catch a glimpse
Of you beneath the satellite dish
When the kids are set and the laundry's piled
It's up to the roof where things get wild
And the cop cars come
With their wipers fast
And their flashing lights
I want in my hands
If I can't have you, I don't want nobody baby
Track Name: Summer Goes Too Fast
Winter has gone and packed its grey duff
Summer has brought its colors
Alma looks good in the back seat
Laughing with all her cousins
Her voice is the loudest, there is no doubt it's
Making the blacktop wavy
Along with the sun, it burns everyone
The big ball it drives us crazy
The radio seems to move our wheels
The bugs they sure love our windshield
With the windows down, life sure is grand
I've got an ice cream sandwich in my hand
Summer goes too fast
What's your hurry now
You gotta grab on fast
Before it leaves your town
Smoke off the grills and burgers and dills
And kissing for thrills, oh, Daddy!
Hydrants all spray to the driver's place leaving you
Drenched but happy
Bring on the sands, the lotion in hands, and umbrella stands,
Ice flavors
Oh, and the swim wear, I'm glad it's all there, even when it's my neighbors
The radio seems to move our wheels
The bugs they sure love our windshield
With the windows down, life sure is grand
I've got an ice cream sandwich in my hand
We'll spend days outside get our T-shirts sweaty
Never put on our shoes, summer we are ready
Summer goes too fast
But it's a great ride
Don't even buckle up
Or it will pass you by
Track Name: Silver Spoon
Silver spoon in your mouth
How I'd love to take you out
Silver spoon, spend some time in my mouth
Silver spoon, right since birth, he's put you to work
Why not rest a bit? It's time for a switch, to my mouth
Oh, shiny one
Oh, stirrer of fate
Give me a fraction of all that you create
I've been dealt only deuces and a few random cards
I've got a fairly nice smile but it's falling apart
Come inside. Come inside
There's plenty of room
Come inside. Come inside
Silver spoon
No one gave me the keys, no one gave me the crutch
No one gave me the breeze, no one gave me the luck
And I paddled and I paddled and I still couldn't reach the shore
And I stretched up on my toe but the cookie stayed in the jar
And I've run and I've tackled, but others still won the game
And they got the sunshine, and I got to stand in their shade
Finally, after such a tug,
You've come undone; you are set free.
Lay your head, on my tongue
I don't care if you burn
I don't care if you burn
Silver spoon
Track Name: Does the Lady?
Does the lady care to see me?
Give her my card describing briefly
Who I am and where she can call me back
Tell me please once it's delivered
Did she squeal or did she shiver?
Or did she simply give my card back?
Did she mention trinkets?
Cuz I like trinkets as well!
A porcelain rabbit
If you should ever find one, I must have it
Does the lady care to see me?
Tell her no more bosoms heaving
With her sobs because I'm not in her midst
Tell the lady lover calling, tell the lady lover calling,
Tell the lady lover calling.
LOVER!
Track Name: Stranger's Foot
When a stranger's foot
It touches mine
It's the sound the earth gives up
When the plane lands fine
And the salted egg, shares its salted taste
Every moment that I feel, is not one to waste
Hollywood
Don't believe it
Greyhound is leaving
Along with my coffee cup
And all that's warm inside
Look out my window
I see a sparrow
The girl next to me
Can read my tarot
Let me tell you what she said was nice
The future's looking bright
I'm safe
I'm not fracturing
Folded sheet set free
Floats down to the bed
Railroad crossing gate
And the signal's turning red
Steamy wet teabag
Still hot on the plate
My sleep pulled by the squeaking of the gate
Hollywood
Don't believe it
Greyhound is leaving
Along with my coffee cup
And all that's warm inside
Hearing, "Hey I'm home"
All my cares tucked in
A kiss to someone watching me
Let that old world grow dim
I'm safe
I'm not fracturing